Hurting yourself by not wanting more – a lesson for moms.

Many mothers receive child support.  In fact, given recent divorce statistics, more than half the mothers in the U.S. have had a divorce, where child support may have been part of the case.  While paying or receiving child support is standard fare in divorce, an ever alarming number of parents create bigger problems for themselves by not keeping the dollar amount current.

Many parents believe that by leaving the issue alone, they are keeping calm in the already fractured relationship.  They don’t want to rock the boat.  Dads don’t bring the issue up, but for no other reason than not to pay more.  But the harm that it causes to both parents usually festers for years before anyone realizes that a monster and been created, and not by plan.  The damage is fairly bad and measurable.

Moms eventually ask for the increase that has been due for years.  Usually a new significant other, or new spouse prods the mom to get her “fair amount” of child support.  An amount that has always been due.  Sometimes, mothers seek an increase because of financial strains on her family, where the child support is low because it had been set 5 years ago (or more). With ever increasing costs of raising children, Mom’s wallets start to shrink without the increase of support.   When moms ask for more, things tend to get ugly.

Moms’ failure to ask for periodic increases cause Dads to have a false sense of security.  They believe that what’s left of their paycheck will always be there.  They start to increase spending (better house, cars, and lifestyle), all without thinking that this could all come to an end, if I have to pay more in support.  As Dads’ income increases, child support does not increase automatically.  So, when moms wait for years, and then want an increase there’s some grumbling about it.   Had mom sought the increase periodically, it becomes business as usual for most Dads and anticipated.  Not so much an issue.

The damage to Moms is more significant.  Because of the grumbling, moms almost always pay more than they should in litigation.  So much is paid, in fact, that Moms shy away from asking for another increase because the cost (in attorney’s fees) exceeds the increase of support.  While States usually have some sort of free service to accomplish the increase, these services are lack luster and protracted.

Gorilla Divorce wipes away that long standing fear of the attorney’s fees, because there are none.  So, moms can now start getting their periodic increases, and dads can budget accordingly – where everyone becomes happy, sort of.

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